• A Queen's Reign,  Blog,  Business,  Health

    My #SSDGM Month: Working in TV Almost Killed Me

    Once I decided I wanted to become a T.V. news producer, it made me feel so good to have a focus. I discovered my love of journalism in high school, but I knew I didn’t want to work for a newspaper. No one in the business had anything good to say about it and made it seem very un-glamorous. When I got to college and discovered T.V. news, I was hooked. It was fast-paced, glamorous (at least to me!) and seemed to fit my personality perfectly. Getting my first job easily out of college solidified my decision to be a news producer. Being a journalist was very important to me.…

  • A Queen's Reign,  Blog,  Health

    My #SSDGM Month: Naps, Nordstrom and Necessary Pampering

    If you’ve visited my social media profiles (and you should cuz obvi – IG, FB, and the occasional tweet) you know I stand behind three main pillars: Naps, Nordstrom and Necessary Pampering. Why? Because I firmly believe the three are necessary for self-care. Let’s talk naps because, in my experience, they’re controversial. Somewhere along the way, we Americans got the idea napping is for the lazy. I disagree! I believe you need to recharge throughout the day! One of my doctors even has a recliner in his office and typically grabs a 30-minute nap during his daily lunch hour. Sometimes it’s not even because my body is tired, but my…

  • Blog,  Health

    I (Almost!) Got A Vitamin Infusion

    To say I’ve been tired is an understatement. I’ve been dragging ass tired. I really thought it was May Madness coupled with participating in Orange Theory’s May Mayhem (omg I went 4 days in a row to workouts MUCH harder than normal – and I normally only go 2 days in a row max – and threw up after the third workout), but I’ve been trying to rest and relax and I’m still not doing any better! Last week, I canceled a girls night outing because I was so tired and we’re gearing up for a family vacation next week. So basically it’s a trip designed to be fun for…

  • Blog,  Health

    I Absolutely Cannot Stand Clutter

    Everyone has their triggers and I have a few, but one trigger I absolutely cannot control is my response to clutter. It makes me want to lose my mind. Especially clutter on the kitchen counters. Oh my gosh, my right eye is twitching just thinking about such things! As a person who suffers from an anxiety disorder, it’s not an uncommon response. It makes you feel distressed, overwhelmed and like there is a mountain of uncompleted tasks waiting for you which escalates your anxiety. My whole family is aware of my affliction with clutter. In fact, my daughters know better than anyone if you leave something unattended on the counter…

  • Blog,  Health

    How I Parent Through Anxiety and Depression

    One of my greatest gifts and often biggest hinderances is my ability to just power through. I can keep my head down and get through pretty much anything at any given time. Parenting through anxiety and depression is a whole new ballgame though. Being on medication doesn’t prevent you from episodes of anxiety and depression, it just helps you to better manage them, but even that’s not always 100 percent. Before kids, no problem. Just stay in bed, ignore the world, have a breakdown, drink too much … whatever needed to be done to get through it. Now that’s not possible. Or safe. No matter what is going on in…

  • Blog,  Health

    Working Out For the Less Than Motivated

    I do not like to sweat. Or get my heart rate up. So I’m sure it comes as no surprise working out – or any physical activity – was never at the top of my to-do list growing up. When my parents forced me to join the basketball team, I did have to lift some weights and running (gross), but it wasn’t until I went to college I finally got into the whole working out thing. See, I was terrified … I mean T-E-R-R-I-F-I-E-D … of the Freshman 15. I didn’t know exactly what caused it and I wasn’t falling victim to it. Naturally, because I’m rule follower who’s pure…

  • Blog,  Health

    Mental Health Awareness: What You Need To Know About Therapy

    The idea of seeking therapy is still a fairly taboo topic for most. They don’t want to think of themselves as a person who’s “so messed up” they need professional help. Though, the Wall Street Journal recently wrote a story about how millennials are much more into therapy than generations before. Go, millennials! I’ve been through several boughts of talk therapy throughout the years with varying results. Some people I outright didn’t like. Others just didn’t seem to get me. Now I have a therapist whom I feel gets me and is also ready to hand out the harsh truth in a way that doesn’t make me feel like an…

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  • Blog,  Health

    Mental Health Awareness: When You’re Off Kilter

    I’ve struggled with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression for about eleven years now. Despite feeling I have probably had these issues most of my life, it was 11 years ago when things I realized I needed to get help. The real struggle in dealing with mental health issues is when you think you’re managing your symptoms just fine and one day you realize you aren’t any longer. During the last 11 years, I’ve had so many setbacks, medication switches and deeply dark days. Maintaining my mental health is an on-going struggle. That piece is the hardest part for me because I’m of the mindset: I took care of it and…

  • Blog,  Health

    Mental Health Awareness: My First Panic Attack

    I will never ever forget my first panic attack. It caught me completely off guard. I wasn’t even actively anxious about anything. I was just sitting at the kitchen counter. It was the scariest thing I’ve ever experienced. Suddenly my heart was racing, I had intense pain in my chest, I couldn’t breathe, I heard a ringing in my ears and it felt like the entire world was sitting on top of my shoulders. I had no control and I felt stuck in some kind of invisible pressure bubble with no way to escape. It probably only lasted about 30 seconds, but it felt like hours. It was absolutely terrifying.…

  • Blog,  Health

    Helping Your Child With Test Anxiety

    I think it’s safe to say, as a parent, you always want your child to do better than you. This is especially true when I see them behaving exactly like me. My sweet little second grader deals with some anxiety – specifically test anxiety. In school, I had THE WORST test anxiety. I remember in 5th grade begging my mom to write me a note saying I never had to take a test again. My struggles with an anxiety disorder started way back when. I also bit my nails like crazy. (Fortunately, neither of my girls do that!) My little sweetie is taking the NWEA elementary assessment test this week.…

  • Blog,  Health

    I Was Told I Couldn’t Get Pregnant Again. Then I Did.

    When our beautiful daughter was 2 years old, we decided we were ready to try and get pregnant again. It was very important to me for our daughter to have a sibling. Getting pregnant with our first wasn’t as easy as we expected, it took a few rounds of Clomid, but it definitely could have been more difficult. After six months of trying, and inconsistent menstruating, I went to my OB/GYN for Clomid. A couple of rounds of it (and another drug I can’t for the life of me remember) and my doctor seemed perplexed. So he sent me to a fertility specialist. The Fertility Specialist I ended up having…

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  • Blog,  Health

    When Is Enough Enough?

    What is enough? To me, it’s an elusive idea. My general rule of thumb is too much of anything is almost enough. The constant concern about what is enough is visible when we have a party (is there enough food?! Spoiler, we always have so much left over), when I buy Christmas presents (do they have enough to open? Are they going to feel enough magic?) and in my personal growth.  When my oldest was about 2 1/2, I began writing little stories about her. Then when she was about 4, I was overcome with this strong desire to change the world. It was all I could think about. I…

  • Blog,  Health

    How Gaining Weight Helped Me Begin Accepting My Size

    So this post is kinda rough for me. It’s going to get real and raw and open myself up to an area I’ve always been super sensitive about: my weight. The road to body acceptance and weight loss is a journey and it wasn’t until I gained 20 pounds last year, I finally got some perspective. Sadly, I’ve always been the girl who thought she needed to lose 10 pounds. Even in high school when I was 150 pounds, I thought I could stand to lose some weight. I blame the fact that I grew up in the 90’s where waif thin was in and, if I’m being super honest,…

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  • Blog,  Health

    Diagnosed with PCOS

    Last week, I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). I’ve been considering how I wanted to write about it … then last night This Is Us kind of stole my thunder. 🙂 I’ve been thinking about this blog post for about a week now and hadn’t moved forward because I didn’t know what I wanted to say on the issue. I’m about to get real REAL with you, so if vaginal bleeding makes you squeamish, I’d suggest jumping down to Chapter Three: F*ing Hormones where things get a little less ick factor. Chapter One: My Period My period has always been a little like Carrie at the prom. Heavy and horrible.…

  • Blog,  Health

    What Most People Get Wrong About Anxiety

    Too many people still don’t understand what it means to have an anxiety disorder. If I was able to just turn off the anxiety, I would. If I could just take a few deep breaths and relax, I would. Anxiety disorder is not simple.  Two weeks ago, I was at the nail salon. I just wanted a pedicure and a regular manicure. I have horrible cuticles and if I don’t stay on top of them, it’s really gross. Just trust me. I also wish I could take care of them myself. I try. I fail. It’s my reality. However, on this day I wasn’t able to go to my usual…

  • Blog,  Health

    How To Help A Suicidal Friend

    This week a friend reached out to me to help her suicidal friend. It was heartbreaking to hear this woman’s palpable struggle with mental illness. I was then immediately concerned about how I could help. I am not a mental health professional. My only experience is my own. I can only explain my journey and what I’ve been through. Immediately, I called my cousin who is a counselor and a licensed clinical social worker. She walked me through how I could be of help to this struggling woman with one important reminder: if she’s suicidal, nothing I can say is going to change her plans, but I can offer her some…

  • low carb
    Blog,  Health

    Low Carb is Terrible for Active Moms

    I always said I would never go low carb. Research shows your brain needs carbs especially first thing in the morning. But 3 1/2 years after having a baby, still struggling to lose weight, it seemed I needed to do something drastic. Sadly, every time I turn around these days someone is saying to me “you need to go low carb” or “go Keto, it’s amazing!” A few women I know have lost a great deal of weight going Keto (they are incidentally also beyond the age 50). My new doctor even recommended it to me. I was still skeptical. Then I saw a video and a picture of myself…

  • Blog,  Health

    We Don’t Have a Gun Problem. We Have a People Problem

    Hoosiers now belong to a club we never wanted to be part: the list of school shootings in the U.S. On May 25, 2018, a student at Noblesville Middle School left the classroom and came back with two handguns. The teacher, 29-year-old Jason Seaman, overtook him and sustained three gunshot wounds. Another student was shot as well. Both are in the hospital in critical condition (IndyStar, 5/25/2018) Tragically, shootings are happening in rapid succession and I’m sick of our society’s response. Stop blaming the NRA, politicians, social media, violence on T.V., video games, etc. We don’t have a gun problem. We have a people problem. These mass shootings have become…

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  • breaking the stigma
    Blog,  Health

    Break The Stigma About Mental Illness

    A topic I had once stayed quiet about now seemed to slowly be coming to the forefront of my life. I started to open up to friends about my struggles of the last year and a half; specifically the horrendous 2018 I was enduring. One of my friends asked me, a bit hurt, “Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” While I appreciate the care and concern and I know the question was born from a desire to help in any way possible, it was kind of a ridiculous question. It’s like asking a drowning person why they didn’t yell for help. I couldn’t keep my head above water. How was…

  • my daughter
    Blog,  Health

    Talking To My Daughter About Mental Illness

    Even though I would fall asleep praying to God to take me away, I would wake up and cry for having those thoughts. I love those girls more than anything and I knew, despite all my flaws, it was best for them to have their mother in their lives. Those horrible feelings lasted for a couple weeks. In the meantime, I found another provider to help me. This woman put me back on the Cymbalta (an idea that terrified me. I begged her no, but was assured there was no other way to stop the withdrawal symptoms I was experiencing) at the lowest dose, 20 mg, and did a much more…

  • struggling to regain stability
    Blog,  Health

    Mental Illness: Struggling To Regain Stability

    So I’ve realized I’m struggling to regain stability in my mental state and my primary care doctor recommended a mental health specialist to further assist me. My nurse practitioner said my medication had stopped working. There’s a medical term for it, but it’s commonly just described as “Prozac pooping out.” I didn’t know such a thing was possible. Fortunately, this time, I was able to help rule out a whole bunch of drugs that wouldn’t work for me and we landed on something that seemed to help pretty quickly. She started me on Cymbalta in January 2017 and things seemed to be going well. Then about six months later, she added…

  • mental illness
    Blog,  Health

    A Mom With Mental Illness

    I consider myself a pretty open person, but I’m kind of private about one area in my life: my mental illness. I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder and depression. I think I’ve probably always had GAD, but was only diagnosed about 10 years ago. I’m definitely a person who startles easily. Growing up, I remember one day my mom asked me, “What is going on at school? Why are you so jumpy all the time?” I told her honestly nothing was going on at school and I didn’t know why I was so jumpy all the time. Even to this day, my husband “announces” himself before he enters a room because…

  • Blog,  Health

    Mental Health Awareness: My Shame, Myself

    Why is it we all so easily feel shame especially when it comes to mental health awareness? Honestly, two years ago I wasn’t talking about my mental health struggles. People in my inner circle knew, but I didn’t talk about it unless I absolutely had to. Then a year and a half ago, I went through something so horrible, I knew it was time to start talking. It was time to break the stigma. I think as women we are more easily prone to shame. Brene Brown said it best in one of her talks about what shame means to women: Do it all.Do it perfectly.Never let them see you…